Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Quick update

This will be short because I am running way behind today but I wanted to update to let those of you praying know that we had our home study update visit at 8 am on Sunday morning this past week. Immigration (USCIS) here in the united states no longer accepts addendums nor are they located in each state anymore, they have been centralized (socialized???) and the result is a full blown home study update with new police background clearances, referrals, home visit, etc. We are waiting for it to be written up and approved again but not sure by whom it needs to be approved by, then there is another family traveling to Ukraine this weekend who will take it if I can get it to them on time. I do not know what all is involved with an home study update other than another 400.00 (before shipping haha) but will pray that it is done soon so I can take it to Columbia to get it apostilled and sent to Tennessee on time to make the plane. I can't imagine anything else needing to be redone but I could not imagine this either so I just gather what I am told and complete MY tasks in as timely a fashion as I can...I let God worry about everyone else. Thanks for checking on us. Cath

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Waiting for what? Commuication malfunction leads to waterboarding

Reminds me of the wardrobe malfunction flash a few years ago. Like waterboarding can be seen as an intense hydrotherapy exercise. So the point of this post? To say that we are still waiting to be submitted because the communication from Ukraine to one person was that my homestudy needed amended to remain in the game of keeping the papers within the 6 month window of non-expiration. Unfortunately the person who was supposed to tell ME that got word that everything was fine. Another 5 weeks wasted. Another 200.00 to get the stupid piece of paper, and drive to the state capital 95 miles each way, and ship it overnight express to an office 5497 miles from here...overnight express is another oxymoron...it takes three days usually. So if I get it there on THURSDAY that is the day for submissions and it sits around for another week because they only take adoption submissions for special needs kids on Thursdays. I should have realized that this is the impossible dream. To have something go right in this process. I can hardly wait til we get there and all this goes wrong in a language I cannot possibly comprehend.
And if even one person tells me not to worry because God is in control I will virtually punch you in the virtual eye. This is flat out spiritual warfare and we have a target on our back. It makes me worry that much harder because I know that things are not as they seem on this planet. Even though I know who wins the war, I am still in the battle and it is getting ugly all around me. And I think I know what hydrotherapy feels like, because I truly think I am going to drown in this paperwork. This at times has been exciting and filled with wonder, but most of it has turned to drudgery and defeat. The joy is hiding somewhere but it is not in this process. I pray that Marina stays safe and out of the arrows. And may God twist this attack and use it to change this defeated mom's efforts into a hail mary pass with a score.

And one more thing. Whoever you are posting in the oriental language, I do not know you and I cannot read what you write. Since one little message link has lead to a porn sight you are being moderated and none of your posts will show up here anymore. If you are kind and good, I welcome your prayers, but I suspect this is nothing that has to do with this journey.

Last week I went to the bank and the question "Why not adopt from the United States?" came around. For one, that is not what God lead us to because Marina is not in the United States. The children who get the diagnosis in the United States that they have a genetic abnormality hit the abortion rate of 92%, then about 6% are kept and the other 2% get placed for adoption....where the wait is 2 or more years because there is a demand that outweighs the supply so to speak. In eastern europe the kids with special needs are deemed less than a human being and are not always treated very well and are headed straight down a path to a good ole 1950's type insane asylum. This has a very bleak effect on the longevity of their life span. This breaks my heart to see something that is so misunderstood be treated so poorly. So this is what the ears of my heart are tuned to hear- the cry of orphans far away that absolutely no one is considering unless you count the 200 people I know trying to navigate this journey towards an estimated 10,000 children who have been diagnosed with Down Syndrome. You do the math.
I move on to getting a quote at a mechanics for something and I get the question "is there anything wrong with the kid you are adopting?" No, she has down syndrome but there isn't anything wrong with her health. "Well, why don't you just wait til they can get you a kid with nothing wrong?" Because I want this one and there is nothing wrong with her. "Well, I guess them kids need somebody to love 'em too." Crimony.

It amazes me how many people have an opinion of what needs to be done in this world and they themselves are doing NOTHING. Now I have to say that the circle of you that I know are generally on board with this in ways that are incredibly supportive. Either you knew Caylyn or your heart has ears too because God cleared them on your own life journey. And I cannot tell you how grateful I am for your support. Because this battle is hard enough with people lifting your earth journey in prayer. I think prayer at the very least keeps hope alive. That is how my own heart took up beating again when it was on its way to being petrified stone. "Call to me and I will show you great and mighty things that you do not know". Boy that's life wide open. Great and Mighty. And believe me, there is ALOT I do not know. But I know I am here to live my life wide open for a purpose until I get to where I am headed at the end of this road. I would be lying if I said I did not wish 4-wheeling with Jesus were not so complicated and the paperwork was not so full of hydrotherapy.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Submission date coming up fast!

We were notified that our papers are being translated and will be submitted to the Adoption department in Eastern Europe on thursday the 22nd. This means we should have a travel date once they approve us...again, we are being "approved" by people even further away and having no real picture of what we are like except on paper. This is pretty amazing to me for some reason. But whatever works you know. We have been at this for 14 months now and at this point I am grateful for the few weeks that we have not been asked for any papers by anyone. I know we will travel soon and we are nervous to be honest. We are running full steam into the unknown. Come to think of it, isn't that what we do every day? Raising funds has slowed down but I know that I am to trust God on this. He has come through always for us.
For any of you that have donated directly to us, it is sitting in an account designated to traveling to get Marina. Recently in the health care bill their has been a change to the adoption credit sneaked in around page 906...it states that the funds not supplied by grants but used for adoption expenses will be returned in the form of a tax refund rather than a tax credit. It also has had the maximum amount raised to just over $13,000.00 We feel at this point that we can do better in the long run by focusing more on adding to our adoption account because we will be able to utilize the refund to assist more orphans when it is refunded. Simply put, we obtain donation "gifts" and use them for adoption, then when the tax refund comes, we can pay it forward by donating to Reeces Rainbow with that money next year. Its like we get to use it twice. For larger donations that we have received we are keeping the records necessary to make sure the donation is made in your name next year by money order and you will get the tax credit next year. I have taken lots of space here to make the point that if you are thinking of donating, and you can wait for the credit for next year, you can actually help by getting double usage out of your donation by donating directly to us. You can help us this year and we donate that amount next year out of the refund. That tax credit of over 13,000 is set to expire at the end of 2011 in case anyone is thinking of adopting and needs a reason to do it this year rather than later on....later on it rolls back to way less than half that amount. Makes ya wonder who benefited from throwing that in the health bill for such a short run, doesn't it?

I hope I explained that well enough. If not, sign the post and I will post the actual link to the new information on this adoption refund change. Thanks for your prayers along the way. I know we could not have done any of this on our own...because when two or more are gathered in His name....and man, you all must have really done some gathering of prayers is all I can say. Climbing Mt. Everest has nothing on adoption. But we are finally at the point where the papers are turning into a little girl who will be coming home. I thank Julie Nalle adopting Aaron, for her sweet disposition of carrying our dossier to our facilitator across the water and hand delivering it to her. Micah Six Eight is her story. They live outside of Charlottesville VA and I think it is important to understand that we became friends months ago on the Reece's rainbow chat sight because we both have great friends in Hopkins Belize. When you realize Hopkins has about a thousand people in it, and America has loads of people in it, and only a handful of people actually adopt a special needs orphan internationally, the fact that we were destined to meet up again in the time line we did is without a doubt an orchestration of God's hand. I was trying to figure out who would be leaving for Ukraine next out of our group and at that moment a comment came across the computer on this blog to be moderated. (I had to do that moderate comments thing due to the amount of viral activity and porn sights that were linked to the chinese signatures-weirdos-happening in a lot of RR blog sights). Anyway the comment was from Julie and she was leaving in 4 days. Our dossier went out from Columbia SC since we apostilled it that same day and that evening 3 minutes before the post office closed I watched a very loving postal worker chuck the paperwork beasty into a large mail bin. Godspeed beast. Across the south, into the mountains, into a bag, and onto a plane...across the water, thousands of hours of effort and then translating that effort, to bring Marina home. Now the journey begins...

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

The girl in the photos...

is NOT Marina! I am sad to say that the updated photos I had posted have been confirmed that it is someone else because that someone else is 120 kilometers from where Marina is residing. So we are back to the babyish photo as our last image of her. The problem is that the new image burns a desire for more information about that child...she is not listed on RR so I do not know anything about her other than where she is and that she does not walk. So other than being totally precious, and wiggling her way into my prayers because I thought she is who we would be bringing home...we know nothing of her. No name no anything. Not even if she is available. Please pray for that little girl to be "discovered" so someone can scoop her right up and bask in the sunshine of that smile!!
Evan and I are taking the day to travel to Columbia and have the papers apostilled while we enjoy the Edventure Museum. Then I can send them to Ukraine tomorrow. Wheee, that makes my tummy flip just considering letting this dossier out of my hands! I want to carry it over there myself just in case....of what I don't know. But just in case. OF course that is a little pricey of a delivery so I will have to immediately scrap that idea....
Posting updates as we move forward...and I bet it gets faster from here on out!! Yeeee Haaa!

Friday, July 2, 2010

July 1, 2010

Should be remembered here as the day a great battle was won...immigration gave us a favorable finding in our application to adopt an orphan. Marina is coming home! I wanted to post last night but work has been so incredibly busy and I got home so late and tired, not to mention just exhausted from finally getting the news. Tully had it in the car all day not realizing that was the paper I have worn a path to the mailbox looking for...but nonetheless here it is. I woke up this morning and all I could say was Thank you. It seems like the first time in so very very long that I did not go to sleep with a beggars prayer on my heart and wake up the same way...I have been begging God for something about this adoption and then something about Caylyn before that for the last several years (4!!) Today all I can say is thank you. Thank you that there is a heaven at all. Thank you there is God. Thank you that God is love and not something bad. Thank you that He made us a way to be there with Him some day and talk with Him now. Thank You probably needs to be bigger...
Today we send the papers to be apostilled after scanning them all in for everyone to see stateside and approve. This is a final check and we can fix anything that needs possibly fixing, though I cannot imagine what that might entail by now...and yet surely something:)
Once everything is apostilled (notarizing the notary at state level), then the dossier ships to our facilitator in Ukraine where it is translated and interpol clearance is run and the application submitted to their State Department of Adoption. They give us a travel date and it is on at that point to travel...
Wow, I can't believe we got that thing after so long...amazing.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Not approved yet, but a beautiful post:)

This week has been filled with the sort of anxiety that I can equate to being in the hospital with Caylyn and could not change the way things were going, slowly and unequivocally not the way I desired.
When things should be different and the world should be different and life is terribly unfair to so many who do not deserve it. I pray and I am frustrated because I do not receive an instant different answer...well, I can hardly say instant now, can I? Marina has waited 14 months so far for us to be able to come to her. That is utterly ridiculous in a day and time such as this. I was so tired of being ignored by immigration this past week to the point that I was convinced our case worker did not even work there any more. I would never be so rude as to totally ignore a person who continually asked the viable question of "Do you have every thing you need? Did the papers all arrive?". I descended on our local Congressional HR Representative more than a week ago as well and SHE took more than a week to call me back, too. I went to the local field office for immigration and someone should give her a medal for dealing with me with the grace she had. I have been in that office three times for information-one just general stuff, one because our fingerprint appointments were not being made, and then to see what the heck was going on currently...it has been since June 1st that I expected everything to be there on the officer's desk...today is the 25th and nothing...so that woman in the field office let me cry while I fussed about rudeness...when it was really just my heart breaking in frustration and sadness for Marina. So the lady wrote our agent and email as I stood there and and listened as she read it back...she was a good editor and left out the sniffling and other sounds....then I left. I got the call later that afternoon from Representative Inglis's office that our case was next on the desk and we should hear something in several weeks. I believe "blew a gasket" was the term we are looking for here. Evidently we could potentially wait 3 months after all the paperwork has arrived at immigration. And they are working on an emergency case...Oh really? Well I think mine is pretty much an emergency case. It is not like we are buying a boat or something and the delivery is off...Marina is not a luxury item that has been placed on hold for our fancy! Every day of not knowing LOVE is the biggest disaster in anyone's existence and sets each and every child back further into sadness and hopelessness. For more than 425 days she has sat around waiting on us. Because that is what they do, they sit. I had a mom who met Marina last month and did not realize it was Marina. The mom fell in love with her and sent the pictures to Reece's Rainbow to see if the child could be identified. The child is not walking and was propped on a ride on toy every day that she was seen by this mom. The child's muscle tone is very very low in her neck and arms and legs and torso...and serious doubts that the child can even walk... perhaps it is all the prayers for her daily, many times a day, that has kept the light in her eyes and a smile on her little lips. Then the information was relayed to the mom who had inquired about her...everyone agrees it is Marina. I have a new picture:) And the Mom who cared enough after bringing home 3, to inquire about this child too, is Shelly. My friend across the miles who is an amazing cheerleader and confidant and drove her beautiful family here so I could brush little Yulia's hair from her face and hear her giggle in person as she went crazy in the swimming pool, is the one who God used to snap this picture while in eastern Europe and bring it home to me, practically hand delivered all the way from Texas:)
I know God is protecting Marina, because I ask this of Him more than anything else through out the day. I need to realize that when I say this is out of my hands, that it is not. I have completed my list, and have freed up my time to pray even more for those who are involved in all of this crazy journey. I believe truly that we are next. Pray with us for Godspeed, undeniable Godspeed. After that terrible day of emotional explosion over not getting answers, at the end of the day something interesting happened...I was at the Vacation bible school family rodeo night with Evan and Tully and we were in a sea of children, I think I mean that literally, and we were milling around the petting zoo filled with rescue animals...and the phone rang from an area code from our state capital. The social services agent who has been pulling for us for so long, called to see how we were doing. It was the first time I had ever spoken with her. And just for the record, she found all our original papers that were misplaced when they were approving us last Christmas.
When it gets too much, really really too much, and something unusual happens out of the blue, in a way that timing is too specific, I can trust that God has used someone to physically relay that He is there. And He knows the insides of our hearts where we keep the hurt and anxiety. Again, we are so often the arms of Jesus for someone else, reaching out to convey love. Don't ignore the whispers to do something out of the ordinary. Her call at that moment in time spoke volumes more to me than she may ever know.
Praying for all of the children, there are sooo many who will never have a fighter come to their rescue this side of Heaven. I think often of the story, " I would cry out to God and ask him why there are so many orphans without loving parents to hug them and love them and keep them secure, but in reality I know He should ask us the same thing". This world is so upside down. I hope our next post will be of our approval from immigration rather than my standard lamenting.





Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The balance beam....

Proverbs 3v27
Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due,
When it is in the power of your hand to do so.


And I wonder and marvel that it takes so long to re-read and approve a document. I simply do not understand this elaborate waiting game...no one in Ukraine does either as I am prodded to send a poke or two in the direction of the agency who holds the cards...14 months of waiting and filling out papers and chasing 25 year old documents and 14 year old documents and 10 year old documents....enlisting governors and enlisting congressmen as of today...so maybe tomorrow or tomorrow or the tomorrow after that. I wait, we all wait, but mostly, Marina waits. And I will not do any more fundraising until we know for sure we are approved. I assume the officer in charge of our case has read our paperwork since she was able to construct such a magnificent shopping list. Now that the ingredients are sitting on her desk, it feels like she can't bake the cake for some reason. I KNOW it has been read already or the list would not have materialized. I know they are thinking of approving us or they would not have asked for the list of paperwork, they simply would have denied us. Every paper we sent them exonerates any question that our fines or penalties were indeed satisfied. And yet at every step of the way, someone takes as long as humanly possible to drag this out. It defies logic. 90 days for department of social services...70+ days for immigration, 4 months for the pardon and parole board...2 weeks here and two weeks there...for a total of 14 months and counting. I am tired of standing on the beam. I want the answer and I want it soon. Like by tomorrow. Does NO ONE CARE about Marina but us? Did I have to mention how much I am learning to hate government agencies? No wonder we have an immigration problem. Who the heck wants to use the front door? Nothing like having a bunch of people who are no better than anyone else judging and sizing everyone up through a bunch of pieces of paper designed to show off the bad stuff....

I want off this beam and I want what is on the other side...a home with Marina. For Marina. By the sacrifice of Caylyn. Like I said, maybe tomorrow.

I would transition and write all about meeting Shelly and the Burman clan but am in a funk right now and would probably do better if I went to make Evan some dinner...I would not do the visit justice right now...but will post when the storm in my soul blows over.