Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Much change, fresh starts

It's been a year and 3 months since my last update. I took off from writing after I came home from a writer's conference and much change occurred the week after that. It was a time I didn't want to write about because I was learning my way by walking out faith through a grey time. Tully and I separated the week after my return... And we learned a new way of life. In many ways it was learning to breathe again because the very air surrounding us changed. I worked 7 days a week and Evan was no longer home schooled. As we were able to maintain, we learned how to work together and bond together as a working unit. A single mom status comes with a sense of being judged and expectations to be everything. I have a whole new perspective of what I see when I hear I am in the company of a single mom....A warrior princess who has no idea how to hang on to the planet some days. As time went on the kids grades rose. They are on honor rolls and Evan has been on the honor roll for the last year. He has worked so hard to overcome the baggage of losing his dad, though still with a long way to go. Marina rolls with things:) her answer to change is "ok". And she means it!

I am so proud of who they are becoming. Evan was accepted into Art Visions gifted program just yesterday. Marina can write and identify so many words now, it is exciting to see her really learning to read.

I came into being single with the attitude that I was devoted to being MOM but no more relationships. It would be too messy and I was done with messy grown ups. The chuckle from God was audible. I came into agreement that if someone came along to help with the kids I could welcome that.... It seemed a safe agreement at the time. A week later a man I work with came up and said he would be happy to help anytime I needed assistance with the kids or if Evan needed a male companion for any events. He was unmarried and had a back ground in Christian camp counseling from his earlier years. I knew he had gone to Bob Jones and was seeking a relationship but I knew his standards were through the roof- and I was not his type but had been his friend for several years.

Anybody else see where this is heading? I sure didn't! Sometimes God leaves us in our cloak of unawareness for our own sake just to complete his plan without arguments from us. But Scott persevered and committed to his offer to help....at a time I realized I was flat out exhausted. I loved working with him at my house to keep it from disrepair and we laugh a lot. He talks to me and coaches me and encourages me in faith and in life.  He is a non smoker, non drinker, non cusser. He is stable and loyal and has a beautiful heart. He thinks I am great:) it's amazing. The kids are growing to count on him for things I cannot do. We are in a safe place and a good place.

After my divorce was final I immediately updated my home study for adoption. I KNEW it was something I was supposed to do.  It was finished and put out nationwide to introduce me as the eligible mom looking for a boy and a girl....something for everyone haha! Evan has always wanted us to have more kids around. His request was that they speak English:) and he wanted a brother for him
and a sister for Rina. Seemed easy enough... And unlike Marina's journey this one was fast and painless...from start til now...in two days we welcome Lindsey and Bentley into our home and lives. She is 5 and he is 4.  Their birthdays flank Marina's birthday by two days on either side....Dec 27, 29, and 31!they are small from what I hear so as a side note if you are spring cleaning, yes I will take your size 3 and 4 boys and 4/5 girls wear :) we are all so excited we can hardly stand it! Life will be another sharp shift towards fun...and I have convinced myself they will play together like kittens.. The more there are the busier they will be in their own world... I attribute this to how much fun everyone has when they are together with cousins and how easy it can be. Ya"ll can quit laughing at me know...

It was amazing how the new little ones just came at the right time and the adoption board that was in charge of them decided I was a great fit...it was all done in three and a half months, and really a month and a half since I saw their little faces. It only takes one picture sometimes. it's all it took me to fall in love with Marina! And I pursued her halfway across the world. What a worthy trip that was...and besides God had the whole journey in the palm of his hand. It's comforting to use the rear view mirror when traveling with God....it is amazing to see where He has taken you and how He opened gates left and right just exactly on time.   Always what the enemy has planned to thwart us God ends up shining through...I have lived through that enough to see it a way more than His promise ( For I know the plans I have for you says The Lord...plans to prosper you and not to harm you!) this is His personality in action.

So all is alive and well and sooo exciting! We welcome prayers during this next phase for sure....that the littles would arrive prepared for a new life and unafraid. And that Evan would embrace his new leadership position with honor....and Marina would NOT boss them to pieces :) and pray for Scott that he isn't overwhelmed....I am still holding him to his original help offer:)
I will begin to document their arrival with photos and periodic updates as I can. Thanks for hanging in there with us! It's never boring:)