Saturday, August 21, 2010

The mundane part of waiting

It has been a while since I wanted to write or could find the time but here it is Saturday morning near the end of August. The home study update has left this country by way of the postal service and a back up copy was hand delivered and yet their plane was delayed just enough. Neither got there in time to be submitted last week. As this has stayed with the theme of running into brick walls in my opinion, I took this rather hard. I have become and insolent child. Sulking and whining. Feeling sorry for us. What is behind that is the fact that I am tired of chasing and doing and gathering and trying so hard to have it fall short yet again. It is discouraging and yet I should be so happy that everything is there! We are truly free from chasing stuff for the moment. I say that warily since the last several times I mentioned this it turned out to be not quite true and anything can, (AND DOES) happen along the path of life.
We continue to pray for safety and well keeping of Marina, as well as the other children. But this is a fallen world and I don't know what praying does exactly. I just want to get there. I believe that we are going but the delay is wearing me thin. The fight has been exhausting and we have not even met her yet. I do not know what else will occur with this journey but we are being conditioned not to quit. I do have an updated picture of Marina, but have decided not to post it here because open blogs have become a problem for some of the parents on RR. One family nearly lost their child referral because another parent stepped in and tried to out maneuver them to get there first. I can't explain it but there is alot going on in this world that we simply cannot see and should not trust. Frankly, it is a war. Maybe that is exactly where prayer can make a difference. Please if you find the time, pray that God's will be done, and we accomplish what He has set out for our journey. Submission of papers should happen next week or perhaps September 2nd. I will believe it when it happens.

4 comments:

  1. I don't know if I ever shared this with you, but Marina is the very first RR child that captured our attention! She reminds us so of our older daughter with Ds. For whatever reason, we did not pursue precious Marina, but instead committed to Bella aka "Brandi" at the time. That said, I have been following your journey with extra interest and prayers. I am sorry your process has been fraught with many bumps in the road. Let's pray that the rest of your journey will be SMOOTH sailing and that your daughter will be in your arms very soon!!! With love, Paula

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  2. Cathy,
    I have followed your journey since February of 2008 when my niece was diagnosed with ALL and our whole family began a journey we never imagined. I have to say that through it all I have been amazed to see the way God has moved in your life. I continue to pray for your family, including Marina, and I must tell you that you have every reason to feel discouraged and every reason to question why, why is this so hard. And you probably thought the hardest part would be making the decision to follow the path your heart was calling you to. But at the same time, I must encourage you to stay strong, stay focused, and do not wallow in your despair too long because is it has no place in a heart that hears God's command and follows it. If I had a wand I could wave to clear your path, I would. Of course we both know that can't happen, so I will enlist the one tool I do posess and offer a prayer to God..."Heavenly Father, I come to you now as a child in need, in need of your guidance, intercession, and blessings upon Cathy and all involved in her quest to bring home Marina. I pray that your will be done and I pray for resolution for this family, for the presence of your spirit in their lives, and for the deliverance of Marina into their home. We give to you this day our doubts, our frustrations, and our anger. We ask that you transform these gifts into your service for we know they were not given to us by you, but that you alone can free us from their curse. Thank you Father for this family and for their abilily to be lights for us all. Please continue to guide and bless them, which in turn will be a blessing for all your children. We love you, Most Holy Father, and praise you with thanksgiving. Amen."

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  3. I know how difficult this journey has been for you. I wish I knew why you have run into so many brick walls, but I don't. Sending hugs your way and lots of prayers. Stay strong my friend!

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  4. Praying for you but also, can I share this with you?

    Isaiah 14v27
    When the Lord All-Powerful makes a plan, no one can stop it.

    Anyway, love you and will keep praying!

    Lu

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