I have been diligent on replacing the forms that were unacceptable for our dossier this past week. I had the original dossier scanned in and emailed to a couple of stateside checkpoints but did not give them enough time to respond before I had to make a decision to send our dossier as it was, over to Ukraine by hitching a ride with another adopting mom in Ohio on her way over to EEurope. It was then that I got the many words that our dossier had some flaws. These flaws
were for the most part, cosmetic. Ukraine will not allow the notary stamp to be touching any ink on the page. None. That alone would have wiped out half my dossier because in SC the method of choice is to tie the notary workings together by stamping the embossed seal over everything. I could only do what I could do. I got mad as I was allowed and seethed on the inside for two days. Then I started over. Totally and completely over. This gives me something to do as I wait for Livescan fingerprinting which now handles NY database for all background checks to run my prints in Illinois so we can assess that I paid a fine from an incident in NY 25 years ago. Let me be clear when I say, never try to lie to immigration. They are like your mama, they already know what you did, and are only waiting to see if you own up to it, no matter how small. If you ever consider adoption, do not take the Bill Clinton route...just be honest instead. No one seems to care when you are honest but they will remember and roast you over the coals if you lie....with that being said, yes, I was honest with Immigration. But we wait for confirmation before they can approve us.
In the meantime, the sky is now black over Europe and the Volcano in Iceland is getting worse instead of better. I am so sure that the parents who are working so hard to bring these children home, have climbed many mountains of obstacles and paperwork but there was never a pending volcano listed on things to watch out for. A reminder, that God is bigger than we are and can do what He deems necessary for the good of someone lost, and not at the comfort of those who are "found". And yet he knows about all of us. It will work together for paths to cross that normally would not, that hearts will have new opportunities because life is happening out of the ordinary for so many. I prefer to place my hope in the loom from the view of above it, rather than the strings hanging down all across the backside of the big picture. I think that is the essense of faith and trust. With that being said, I struggle daily when obtaining paperwork that no one will ever look at again taxes my very being with frustration. So it faith easy? No, it is not the easy way to travel...but it is the safest place for me to allow my heart to remain alive and hopeful. If this world was all there was, I would be dark in the middle of my soul. Which technically would not even exist. Man, I do not even want to think about that!
As I was struggling with that faith and path thing about getting to Ukraine and seeing Marina and just questioning the ending of this journey from here and actually getting on a plane to there, I was feeling completely rained on. The NO Umbrella big fat pity party sort of storm. And the mail came yesterday with a total of a thousand dollar donation attached in there...for bringing Marina home. It felt like a thousand promises. I was overwhelmed not only by the amount but by the timing. The out of the blue timing....and God said, yes, you will get there.
I have been hesitant to raise further awareness of our pending financial need because I wanted to be sure we will travel before we load the account with funds that will revert to Marina in the case we are denied. But that is not quite right. Because if we love her like we say we do, if something were to happen, we would want her to have a family immediately. No matter that it would break my heart for it not to be us. So I will look into a big idea I have been mulling around in the last few weeks and see if it is doable in the upcoming month....it is a groovy fundraiser idea if it works, so I will not mention it yet. Many questions need answered first, primarily a location.
Please pray for the parents who are trapped here and cannot travel because Kiev has shut down from the volcano ash and please pray for the parents who have gone through so much and have little funding left, and are trapped in Kiev for the same reason. I posted a blog in my last post but she had to make it private the same day I did so, please forgive and disregard.
We are working hard, so if I am quiet in my posts, it is not because I am idling away my time. It is because I am afraid to whine about the paperwork and dissuade someone else from saving a child...this is not about expanding our family anymore. It is about their being a serious huge sad need for love in this world. I cannot love all of the children because that is asking too much. But if we each love one in some way, they will find homes and their lives will not be lost for the remainder of earth. This can be done in different ways....by prayer, diligent daily support...by committing to your own orphan and bringing them hope, by financially supporting a family adopting (anyone! it does not have to be me!) ...by spreading the awareness that the need is tremendous. Doing anything is better than doing nothing. Answer your own heart if it speaks. It is the podium for the spirit of God.